Torn, written by Tiffany Brown & Lynnette Roberts, Executive produced by Ex- NFL player and Super Bowl champion Dorsey Levens. Torn features a cast of accomplished actors and former professional athletes who have successfully transitioned to stage performances.

Torn will hit the stage on July 14^th and be shown till the 18^th at the 14^th Street Playhouse in Atlanta.

Torn is a Christian drama that touches into the relationships of today. While watching the cast rehearse at Eyedrum, the reality of this play is one that many of us can relate to on a daily basis.  Torn tells the story of a couple’s relationship that has hit its breaking point.  With deception, various obstacles and consequences, the question still remains as to whether or not this couple will be able to mend what has already been Torn.

As I prepare for my interview with Lynnette, Tiffany and Dorsey, I am in admiration for the talent before me that is preparing for a play that is sure to hit the stage big and become a phenomenon. The actors have engaged me and are making me anxious to see the ending result. I am astounded how Torn is an illustration for the truth of so many relationships of today. The story line is about issues, choices, and consequences, the ultimate gratitude that can make or break our relationships. I look forward to seeing the great successes that are to come with this stage play.  I must say, this is a well written story that is sure to attract the attention of the community. In the production, Tiffany is directing and Dorsey is the assistant director, along with stage manager Shay.  Shay also stars in the play with the stage name Misha Moore.  Tiffany describes Shay as having a true passion and unraveling experience in acting. She says that Shay serves as the coordinator of on and off stage managing and she is an integral part of the production team. With all the action taking place at Eyedrum during the rehearsal, I was able to pull co-writer Lynnette for majority of my inquisitive questions and snag Tiffany and Dorsey at intervals.

Here is the interview I was able to get from a few members of the team.

TRA: How well do you all know each other?

Lynnette: We met at our home church, called Destiny Metropolitan Worship Church in Marietta, GA.

TRA: How did Torn come about?

Lynnette: The church has an event called, “Expressions” that we host annually. We thrive for ways to display and introduce Christ in different ways, in order to attract the audience that wouldn’t normally come to church. We put on a play, Tiffany was the Drama team leader and I was over production. Dorsey was an actor in the play at the time, in which he still holds that same role currently. After such an excellent response and standing ovations, we knew this was one that needed to be brought further into the community.  We wanted to bring more recognition by taking it in front of hundreds if not thousands.  With Dorsey’s belief in the play and funding, we were able to make it possible. The message in Torn is so powerful and it doesn’t come as your traditional gospel play. Our hope is that Torn will come as a tool for people to understand the logic of their relationships or marriages, and knowing what it will take to make the marriage work in addition to what it takes to keep it together.

Dorsey:  In February we had two shows at the church consisting of 550 people, and we sold out. It was a great feeling to see and hear the testimonials of people coming up to the different cast members and telling them how it touched their lives. It was comment after comment. From that point on, funds were needed, and it was a great opportunity for me to give towards something so awesome. I was able to come in and get behind the scenes, and learn things as I move forward, learning from Lynnette, Tiffany, and Shay.

With his pacing, and stern directives, I had to know Dorsey’s character off stage for Torn.

TRA: Who is Dorsey on set?

Dorsey: I bring to the table outside of acting, the muscle behind Tiffany’s voice. I’m real stern. I don’t like people being late. Everyone wants to be great, but you have to put in the work. Greatness is not rewarded it is earned. You have to take personal accountability. We are a team, no part is bigger than the other. Everyone has to do their part to the best of their ability. We all have to put in the work. My Job is to keep everyone focused and on the same page as we move forward.

TRA: Can you give me a basic description of Torn in your own words?

Lynnette: Torn will allow you to see that every decision has a consequence, rather good or bad. However, keeping God in the midst of all decisions, allows for better understanding. Torn will give a firsthand look of how and why it’s important to hold on.

Tiffany: This story speaks in regards to relationship that has been severed. They have allowed interferences from outside to disarrange their foundation.  Torn takes you into the basics that exist in any relationship and/or marriage. Allowing you to see the real life relevant issues and those arguments are normal things that couples face.

Dorsey:  It’s a Christian based play, not overly religious. We hope to bring non- believers to the church. Torn doesn’t consist of real preachy dialogue however, there is reference to scriptures from the bible in play. For the most part, it’s just real life. We have no specific target audience, it’s just for everyone.

TRA: Where was the name “Torn” derived from?

Lynnette: Basic brainstorming. And just thinking of what a lot of relationship experiences and that is “Tears”. It becomes complicated and overwhelming in a relationship when there are tears that need to be repaired. With every decision, you make that choice to tear or build upon your relationship. Whenever you have a constant flow of un-happy tears, then something is “torn” and needs repair.

TRA: Who are the main characters?

Lynnette: Brice and Dana Kelly

TRA:  What can the audience expect from coming to see this play?

Lynnette: I think they will feel that it’s real. They would be able to identify or know of someone that represents the dialogue in Torn. They will walk away feeling and understanding the truth, honesty and inspiration of the characters. They will be able to relate to the characters and the experiences that may very well be personal within their homes. They are going to laugh. The ultimate goal will be achieved if they walk away with some insight on their own personal life. A lot of people don’t know what it takes to work on or even hold on to a relationship. For some that didn’t grow up in two parent households, they can be unsure of what that really means. A woman must gain the understanding of knowing her role as a wife and respecting her husband.  My favorite quote in regards to a severed relationship is, “You both have been here physically, but you left a long time ago, emotionally”. We have to know that there is more to a relationship than just sexual emotions. There are recreational, spiritual, intellectual, social and physical emotions. The sooner we understand and respect those emotions in our relationships the sooner we can grow and have a better hold before walking away.

Tiffany: They can expect to get hit with real hard truth while enjoying a fun play, with faith based undertones. They will get a mixture of drama, comedy, and inspirational messages delivered in a format that is uniquely Christian drama. Torn is not your typical play. Although it is Christian based, its originality began as Christian outreach to engage and attract our non-believers, therefore the language is flattering to attract the audience no matter what your faith based stance is.

TRA: Can you say that this play is a direct relation of the reality of everyday relationships?

Lynnette: Definitely, what’s so cool about this story is that the gender perspectives and roles are what we actually say.  Being written by two women, we surely scrubbed the story for reality and truth. We had to make sure that our information was as accurate as possible. We met with men and women. In meeting with the married couples, they told us about mother-in- law issues, respect issues, etc. We actually had real life stories to pull from, and we were so grateful for that.

Dorsey: Yes, being engaged and knowing married people, the reality is that there is always going to be issues in the marriage. Everyone has been in relationships, everyone has ups and downs, the question is what do you do about it and how do you hold on.

Tiffany: Yes it is. There are so many issues that relationships face in this new century. You have Facebook interference, where old friends and old lovers are reconnecting and rekindling at any given time. Technology is rapidly expanding and relationships are rapidly ending. Ryan Cameron of V-103 music station had Dorsey on the show, and he homed in on how Facebook is re-connecting past relationship and chapters that people have closed in their life, which is not good. People are starting to losing interest in their relationships instead of rebuilding.

TRA: In every beginning you must have a destination, so with that being said, what is the goal of Torn?

Lynnette: Our goal is for people to see that there is hope in your relationship when and if you make the decision to make it work. So often relationships are treated like a cactus, which requires a little sun and water to grow. With a real plant just a little wont work. You have to give it time. It may have to be replanted and it requires nurturing at every stage. That’s the same attention our relationship requires. We want people to commit to the journey of their relationships. You have to put in the work and make the decision not to go. You can’t rebuild by yourself, it takes two people.

Dorsey: The sky’s is the limit, we haven’t placed any boundaries. We will do our best and see where it takes us. (While interviewing, a lead singer in the play captures our attention, right in the midst of our conversation, her voice was beautiful). The lead singers are phenomenal. It’s not the typical gospel play, they are not singing the entire time. They sing in between each scene. As the set changes, the music begins. I must say, the singers are admirable, their vocals are an excellent collaboration, signifying the greatness in this play.

Tiffany: Our direction is going right to the big screen. This is our formula for a movie.

TRA: Do you plan to write and direct more?

Lynnette: Yes, I love writing and I feel like I am in the position to do more. We are not short on stories, just short on stories speaking to the spectrum and relations to our community. There are so many stories to be written and we want to bring them to the community. Tiffany is working on a new theatre company called Higher Calling.

Tiffany: Yes definitely. My plan is to start on other projects. I think my focus will always be geared towards relationships. It may be familial relationships, but the focus will be in that arena. I definitely want to focus on stories that are relevant and current with issues affecting our communities and relationships as a whole.  They will always be faith based.

Dorsey: If the opportunity presents itself. I have surely learned from Tiff and I comfortable with the producing part of it. Directing takes experience and Tiff got 20 years of experience, 13 years more than I. The experience and grind that I have gained as an assistant, has formulated my preparation of moving forward in the direction of these roles.

TRA: Tell me about Higher Calling Theatre Company?

Tiffany: God gave me this vision about 7 years ago to create a Christian theatre company. Although there are several in the metro area, … I had the desire for a contemporary faith based play, not just a mere entertainment and faith based. You have your playwright Tyler Perry, etc. that have shows and a production company, … in respecting and realizing my surrounding of other great statures amongst the talent, my long term goal, is to have a playhouse solely dedicated to these works. I want to have a full season of shows that people can come to throughout the year, and the focus will be faith based.

TRA: Any ending comments for the audience to know:

Lynnette: Come out and enjoy and well prepared Christian based play that will surely give you a different outlook on your current relationship or relationships to come. You will definitely leave with a different outlook on what you could’ve done differently, what you can do better, and how you can repair what’s Torn.

Dorsey: We have a talented cast with great energy. This play takes you on a roller coaster. It is serious, funny, emotional with everything intertwined. There are a lot of names that people won’t recognize, but when they leave the playhouse, they won’t forget who they were.

Tiffany: This is going to be a totally different experience. Come out, take a chance on our playwright and staff members. You will enjoy the show, and I promise you will leave with a good message and a refreshing experience.

As I wrapped up my questions, and took a last glance at the cast and the great minds behind a promising play, I left saying to myself, “Show time!”, because Torn is sure to gain the recognition it needs, in addition to repairing our community as a whole. This play is revitalizing the hope that is needed in keeping relationships and marriages together.

Atlanta’s 14th Street Playhouse, July 14^th –18^th, Wednesday – Friday at 8pm; Saturday at 3pm and 8pm; Sunday at 3pm and 7pm.

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Tucked away in the Virginia Highlands off of Monroe Street is a giant, bustling shopping center called Amsterdam Walk.  Inside there are plenty of restaurants and bars to discover but there is one in particular where you will find the prettiest girls in all of Amsterdam, predominately cute girls who like girls.  Gents are welcome too, just more scarce.  Maybe that’s the reason they have a neon HEAVEN sign on the wall.  Only kidding, boys.

This past Friday, DJ Vicki Powell presented the 2^nd annual Ladystache event, where ladies who donned ‘staches secured both a free cover and the satisfaction of feeling slightly more debonair than usual.

DJ Vicki had the bar bumping in full swing upon my 11 p.m. arrival, party o’clock, spinning tunes such as “Bad Romance” by the diva who isn’t afraid to be dirty, Lady Gaga, as well as “Sunshowers” by M.I.A., the diva who wields lyrics like weapons.

But the musical highlight of the evening was the debut of “Wonderous Wonderpuss,” the first psychedelic single from The Bee’s Knees, a burgeoning, local all-girl band.  If the amalgamation of the song’s hypnotic sound, stirring lyrics, and sensual beat is any indication, The Bee’s Knees will be a band for which you should keep an eye, or rather two ears out.

Boasting a spacious dance floor, bottle service, as well as a hot, friendly staff, Bellissima is a prime event spot.  The slight, plunging candelabras and sexy lighting  exude an elegance that sets it apart from other ladies’ joints in town.

Some notice a few inconveniences with the place. Smoking is disallowed inside. Competition for the pool table makes it nearly impossible for a novice to get in practice time. But these should be of little matter.  Bellissima is not where to go to play pool.  It is a place to dance to good jams and to see and be seen by good-looking gals.  Definitely do not wait before the third annual Ladystache to pay a visit to Bellissima.

The first thing Susan determined to do was to obtain top-rate legal counsel. Susan had heard many stories from girlfriends and acquaintances. She knew women who were out-represented by their spouses and who were virtually left with nothing. Susan wanted a legal representative who would fearlessly voice her expectations. She knew that getting someone with her best interests at heart would be not only wise, but necessary Susan and Greg’s split was destined to be complex, what with Greg’s unfaithfulness, custody issues involving their three children, and the division of their substantial financial assets. Finances aside, she purposed to be organized, attentive and vigilant.

The second thing Susan pursued was weekly meetings with a licensed therapist. While she and Greg had tried marriage counseling only as a last resort, Susan realized she could benefit from individual therapy. Susan had been profoundly wounded by Greg’s infidelity and felt that she was struggling with trust issues. Additionally, Susan had battled depression in her teens and understood that apart from legitimate assistance, she was likely to face old demons yet again. Susan realized her goal of staying mentally healthy and balanced was not only important for her during the separation proceedings but important for parenting her children as well.

The third and final thing Susan focused on was her physical fitness and well-being. Susan had been wounded by infidelity. She was tempted to judge herself as unattractive and unfit. Although she desired to give in to impulses rooted in comfort food and the escape of television, Susan made a priority out of daily work-outs. She began spending time with an athletic guru who helped develop the proper exercise regimen for her. She understood that keeping physically healthy would be crucial to her adjustment to single parenting. Additionally, she found the routine of the daily exercise brought order to her sometimes chaotic world.

So while Susan’s union did not endure as she envisioned, she vowed to take control of the stresses brought about by the dissolution of her marriage. She pro-actively took charge of her circumstances and began choosing activities that would be advantageous. She opted to associate with people who could help her reach her goals. By understanding her desires and defining possible pitfalls, Susan was able to confidently approach her future.

It is all about committing to connect, and creating opportunities to make that happen. Be sure to involve everyone in the fun by asking them to bring a dish or other element. No one likes to show up at a party empty handed and it is easier if you specify.

Here are just a few more ways you can celebrate your friends!

Halloween Fright Night
Time to spook it up and get back to the reason Halloween was created. Let’s return to scary for just a bit. Come as your favorite ghost, ghoul, monster, witch, or werewolf. This isn’t about any stuffed shirt party but a chance to make grunge look good and frightening.

You can incorporate trivia here with questions about famous vampires, Dracula, monsters and more (sure Buffy counts!) You may even want to create a mini haunted house complete with ghostly blow ups and spider webs and haunting music. Have everyone bring their most terrifying treat to share.

Celebrate your friends with a Halloween Fright Night!

Broadway Nights
Girl friends and I got together and bought season tickets to a local community theatre. We go on a Saturday night about once a month and all convene for dinner before hand at our favorite neighborhood café. It is a lot of fun and this particular theatre has never let us down with a real variety of plays and great talent playing. I’d like to do the same with a handful of other venues as it means we have guaranteed seats and a night on the calendar to look forward to.

I have noticed that there are regular groups of couples that get together for the same theatre shows and even parents with their children and make it a family cultural outing. It is still a celebration of friends!

Outlet Therapy
I know that most men don’t enjoy shopping (okay they hate it!) except when it means being left for days at a home improvement center or auto dealership. So to make sure everyone has fun, the guys need to have guy stores to hang out at like Frontgate, Bass Pro Fishing, Brookstone, Best Buy, Circuit City, Bose or any sporting goods store. Usually there is at least one of these in most of the popular outlet shopping centers. Then the ladies can have their occasionally necessary shopping therapy at a discount.

Men are generally quite happy with one or two resources and spending time in research while women like the more stores the better, flitting from one to the next always in search of the best bargain (very rarely is it the ideal fit or most flattering look and many times it will sit in the back of the closet with the tag on, but it will be bragged about as the ultimate steal to fellow bargain hunters!) If children are in tow it can be helpful to ensure a stop mid-shopping at a food and entertainment emporium like Chucky Cheese.

Savvy retailers often provide play areas to allow Mom better shopping focus. The key is to know that something as proverbially ordinary as shopping can be a chance to celebrate friends and another pair of eyes is always appreciated to share the virtues of a dress that we might not otherwise need.

Celebrate your friends with outlet therapy!

Goodwill Games (Bunko/Bingo/Bridge/Poker)
I’ve got a handful of friends that have regularly scheduled game nights well apart from a supper club or theatre night. The games are most often a group of women or men, rarely mixed and include bunko, bridge, gin rummy, poker, and even bingo. Crowds range from four to ten plus and easy eats are provided in the form of sandwiches and appetizers.

Jigsaw puzzles could be added to this mix and certainly scrabble, monopoly, pig mania (really a blast!), and trivial pursuit. This is a really nice change from the monotony and soloness of computer games. It is a good social opportunity and allows for some of the competitiveness to come into play, just no sore losers please!

Celebrate your friends with a goodwill games night!

Art for the Ears
Recently I attended a concert at Atlanta’s Botanical Gardens with friends. It was a beautiful night and though they were very restrictive in not allowing food or drink brought in, they did provide for purchase delicious gourmet fare, beer, and wine by the glass or bottle. It made it very easy and the venue was smaller and more intimate than a large concert hall or performing arts center. I realized that it wasn’t truly important to me who was playing but that it was the comradery we enjoyed and the minimal planning since we could buy our feast on site only.

Now whether you are game for an outdoor venue and take your chances with weather or prefer the safety of a music center or playhouse is up to you. Music truly is art for your ears and it is another fun way to celebrate friends by creating a regular concert schedule to enjoy together. It can include food, beverage and picnic style or just grab a bite before or after at a local tavern. The point is to share the experience.

Celebrating time with our friends is one of the best parts of this life experience. It is up to each of us to create that time and make the commitment to honor those relationships.

Copyright 2008/2009 Melissa Galt

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Here are just a few ways you can celebrate your friends!

Savory Supper Club

This works well with couples or singles but is usually a kid free event. This can be a great way to get to know neighbors or other residents in a subdivision. Often it’s location is rotated monthly between different homes in a neighborhood. A supper club can be very simply created with each couple or person bringing a dish each time, categories are designated to avoid duplicate dishes or too many salads or appetizers. It is a chance for comradery and fellowship particularly amongst those that live nearby.

The food preparation duties and expense are shared by all, as are the benefits of original recipes and home cooking. Clean up is usually light work with many hands, and everyone relaxes and has a good time.

Super Sporting Event

Make it a real mixed event with singles, couples, and kids if desired. It can be live or on TV. If live, plan a festive tailgate is to bring everyone together before the game. If televised set up a buffet for noshing during the game and it can be pot luck, with everyone bringing a dish. Stick with paper plates and plastic cups and flatware and clean up is a breeze.

Just Girl’s/Guy’s Night Out

This is Mars and Venus’s chance to have some time to themselves with friends. Often a once a month regular event, sometimes once a week, this is a chance to connect with close gal pals or guy buddies and gossip, dish dirt, high five on successes, and commiserate on losses. It can be as easy as establishing a place to meet and regular date and time and everyone just shows up. Or it can rotate at private homes but needs to be understood that it is for just the girls or just the guys. We all share a little differently in mixed company! What is said with this crowd stays with this crowd.

Burning O’ Your Troubles Bash

Usually I throw this one just after New Year’s it is a great way to get the New Year off to a truly beneficial beginning. Again who you invite is up to you, generally this is reserved for adults only. You can make it potluck or provide the food yourself. Each person is to bring a listing of their last year’s trials, tribulations, losses, and challenges. You have a fireplace or preferably an outdoor fire (bonfire or chimenaya works really well) and each gets a few minutes alone to literally burn their troubles. Then each party goer gets a New Year’s cracker and that includes a paper crown which they then fill (some write these on the crown itself) proverbially with their hopes for the New Year and burn that as a toast to universal energy. I usually end the festivities with sparklers for everyone to have one last sizzle!

Oscar Party

This falls in early March so it is a great chance to catch up and celebrate with friends between New Year’s and Memorial Day. It is a dressy function with costumes optional. You can download the ballot forms online and I encourage ordering party favors and prizes with a Hollywood theme, again online sources abound. Be sure to start it a little early so everyone can get comfortable mingle a bit and get a bite. Decorate with Oscar statuettes and lots of gold, silver and black. Go glam!

You’ll usually have a handful of die hard movie fans that will be so intent on watching the awards that they won’t really socialize and will shush folks that talk during the show! Having a friend play emcee if you don’t want to do it can keep the party going with trivia questions and prizes. Everyone wants to win!

Be sure to check out Part II of this article for more great ways to celebrate your friends, including a Halloween Fright Night!

Copyright 2008/2009 Melissa Galt

Get your free edition of Interior Destinations, Melissa Galt’s award winning newsletter devoted to Designing Your Business for Your Best Life Now, available at melissagalt.com. For more great articles and tips, check out Melissa’s blog at todaybydesign.com.

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In his book “The Bridge Across Forever,” Richard Bach asks the question,

“Have you ever felt alone in a world of strangers, missing someone you have never met?”

The book goes on to describe his search for a partner in life, what he calls a “soul mate.”

I believe that all of us have a profound desire to find someone with whom to have a deep and abiding, intimate relationship.

This search springs from a longing inside each of us to find completion and wholeness with another person.

We fear what I we want most

Let’s take a look at some of the obstacles to finding this kind of relationship.

Fear of intimacy

We human beings are fairly complicated. Many people deeply fear the very thing they most want. Striking a healthy balance between a fear of and a desire for an intimate relationship can be very difficult. When a fear of intimacy takes over, people can become experts at relationship sabotage.

Faulty relationship radar. Some people continually make the same poor choices of partner. It’s as if each of us had an “internal radar” that picks up “our kind” of person.
Whether your radar scans for healthy or unhealthy choices depends on how it is set. How your internal radar, is set depends on three factors:

1) your self-esteem,

2) the model of relationships set by the family in which you grew up and

3) your own relationship experience.

Movies, literature and music have given us the notion that “somewhere out there” is the one perfect person for each of us. I’ll probably get some letters about this, but I don’t think this matches reality. If you just look around, you’ll notice that many “perfect matches” are divorced within a few years.

In one episode of the 1-V show “M•A•S•H” is a scene in which Hawkeye and Margaret are sitting at a bar commiserating about their relationships, which have just ended. One says to the other, “Our problem is that we keep looking I for a perfect, tailored fit in an off-the-rack world.”.

This is where a great many people get stuck. It’s my belief that in fact there are many people out there who have the potential to be a “good fit” as a soul mate.

Chain relationships. In much the same way that chain smokers will smoke one cigarette after another, some people move out of one relationship and then immediately into another’. These people are typically running from something and have very little knowledge or sense of self when they are not in, relationships.

Concentrate on yourself

Now that we have looked at a few of the obstacles to finding a soul mate, let’s consider a few tips that might aid in the search.

Becoming the right person vs. looking for the right person This means at least two things:

1) developing yourself to the point that you become eligible to be someone’s right person and

2) adjusting your own relationship radar so that you bring yourself into contact with suitable potential partners.

The truth of this has been borne out in my interviews with hundreds of couples. When I ask the question “How did you two find each other?” countless people say that, when they stopped looking and focused on something else in their lives, their current partners just showed up.

It’s an interesting paradox – finding by not looking.

Know what you are looking for

I was on a radio program recently when a man phoned in to say that going to singles meetings looking for a partner is like going to a used-car lot to find a nice car. I bet he gets lots of dates.

That aside, a different car analogy is useful here. When we go shopping for a car, we usually have a mental list of things we must have in a car as well as things we would like to have. Sometimes, we find one with many things we would like to have, but without one of the must-haves. It would still drive OK, but it’s just not for us.

Looking for a soul mate, it’s important to know what you would like to have and what you must have. That’s a list worth developing.

Visit http://www.ConsciousDatingAtlanta.com for more tips and tools for living the life you love with the love of your life. We invite you to subscribe to our f-ree 5 Day E-Course “How to Find Your Life Partner” Jeff Herring is a Singles and Relationship Coach and the Director of Conscious Dating Atlanta.

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